Leaving Scranton (Out of the Office)

If you have to leave an out of office message on your work email, try to have a sense of humor. I mean, really, no one reads these things anyway, but for the three people who do… Well, you might get a good reply if you write something like this:

I’m out of the office for the rest of the afternoon. Please contact [name] if you need assistance before my return.

If this an emergency, dial 911. This is not an offer to buy or sell securities, void where prohibited, stand behind the white line while bus is in motion, batteries not included, deliberate concentration and inhalation of contents may be harmful or fatal, call before you dig, slippery when wet, consuming raw or undercooked meat may increase your risk of foodborne illness, ring bell for service, do not expose to heat or flame

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